ARAN PRESS STAGE PLAYS

1036 S. FIFTH STREET

Louisville, KY 40203

 

ARAN PRESS PLAYS WITH 5 TO 6 CHARACTERS

ABORTION?
by Dick W. Zylstra
Cast: 3 men and 3 women. Two acts. Comedy. Set: living room.
ABORTION? probes people's attitudes about a national issue and how those attitudes change depending on who is pregnant. First the young son's girl friend is believed to be with child. Then the unmarried daughter is discovered to be pregnant, resulting in more confrontations. Finally, the middle-aged mother becomes pregnant, which leads to the ultimate confrontation and denouement. The subplots revolve around romance, unemployment, facing life's challenges, and dreams of get ting rich quick. ABORTION? has had two runs at the American Theatre of Actors in New York City with excellent response from the audiences. The chief virtue of ABORTION? is it presents a controversial subject in a palatable and entertaining way without taking sides. It just might get audiences thinking while making them laugh. Book $4.00. Royalty $30 - $20.

***

ADVENTURES OF THE STRAIGHT SHOOTER
by Wells McConnell
Cast: 3 women and 3 men. Two acts. Melodrama. One set: Hotel/Saloon.
Our hero Basil Grandperson secretly known as a town tamer, and his mother Widow Genteel Grandperson take shelter in a gold camp filled with 100,000 miners. The characters in the camp are: the lovely heroine Miss Prudish Honorable; her father the town drunk known as Bungles; the villain ous Sheriff Swagger Throwdaggers; and his rotten accomplice Miss Tarnish. Basil learns to his horror, that Sheriff Throwdaggers has forced Miss Honorable to become a dance hall floozy in his saloon; and worse, Basil's mother will have to do the same. Book $4.00. Royalty $30 - $20.

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ALL THE WAY TO THE TIGERS
by Roger Myers
Cast: 3 men and 3 women. Two acts. Drama. Set: a living room.
Wealthy Corinne Johnson Hannibal has her brother, his wife, and their 21 year old son. They come together with Corinne's attorney and his wife, for cocktails and dinner. Corinne is vulgar, outspoken, and cruel. In the face of Corinne's explicit contempt and verbal abuse, it is amazing how subservient everyone is before her. She is, however, very wealthy, and in one way or another it appears they are all dependent on her. Despite their attempt to politely endure her, Corinne is out for blood. She begins revealing things about each of them that are shocking revelations to the others. Why is she doing it? Just to be mean? No, in an odd way she is actually trying to help them! Book $5.00. Royalty - $30 - $20.

***

THE BARD REVISITED
by Leonard L. Perlmutter
Cast: 1 man and 4 women. Two acts. Set: the interior of a gardener's cottage.
Ken Harrison, a middle-aged professor of drama, is just about to move into a Florida cottage with his girlfriend Jill Wade, an attractive widow in her mid-thirties. The cottage is really run-down, but they're going to stay and fix it up nice anyway. Also Jill's rich friend Louise Wilson has given Ken a job directing the Palm Beach Players group.....or at least their production of TWELFTH NIGHT. Everything's going pretty good for Ken. But, then, he starts to screw up by screwing around with Louise Wilson. On top of this he replace a noted actress with Louise's snotty daughter in the leading role of Viola in TWELFTH NIGHT. Book $4.00. Royalty $30 - $20.

***

BLACKOUT
by Richard Morton
Cast: 4 men and 2 women. Two acts. Comedy. Set: apartment.
David and Lynn Peterson live happily in their modest New York Apartment, occupying themselves with the usual electronic diversions and demands of a young family. But when a power outrage plunges them into darkness they are forced to face something totally new...each other. And if that wasn't hard enough, their apartment soon fills with a wild group of characters that include a beauti ful model, a sex-starved old lady, her mute husband, and Lenny, a hapless burglar. As complication builds upon complication the results are both hilarious and heart-warming. "It suggests an early work by a writer who could turn out to be a big Broadway success...a highly enjoyable play," Spokane Daily Chronicle. Book $4.50. Royalty $35 - $25.

***

BLURRED VISION
by Roger Myers
Cast: 3 men and 2 women. Two acts. One set: a library/parlor.
In the spring of the year, during a rain, Philip Bona, a retired garage mechanic, stands in the library of a big old mansion and drinks with his wealthy host John Miller. Philip is glad he is there, but just a little nervous because he is not exactly sure why he is there. All he knows is John invited him. Robert Ames, a successful stockbroker, another invited guest, arrives. Robert, like Philip, is curious as to why he has been invited, and yet he came. John's wife, Sydney, is introduced, and slowly the relationship of the four, what the four of them mean to each other, have meant to each other, begins to unfold. John and Sydney have full comprehension of the fact that they have all lived other lives in past times. Book $4.50. Royalty - $30 - $20.

***

BODY! BODY?
by Dick W. Zylstra
Cast: "The Guilty Party"4 men and 2 women. "Body Perm"4 men and 2 women. Set: "The Guilty Party"sun-room office; "Body Perm" a beauty parlor.
BODY! BODY? is two one acts structured on the basic old gag of disappearing corpses. In "The Guilty Party," a family gathering degenerates into an hilarious scramble to conceal the body of a rich uncle believed to have been murdered. In "Body Perm," a spy is killed in a beauty parlor, and when the owner of the parlor tries to report the murder to the police, the corpse isn't where it is suppose to be. BODY! BODY? premiered at the Hartley House Theatre in New York City to excellent audience response. Book $4.00. Royalty $30 - $20 (both); $20 - $15 (individually).

***

BRANCHES AMONG THE STARS
by T.S. Kerrigan
Cast: 3 men and 3 women. 2 acts. Sets: a path in St. Stephen's Green, the drawing room of the Joyce home and Glasnevin cemetery. BRANCHES AMONG THE STARS focuses on the life of famous Irish writer James Joyce in his early years, particularly his Dublin years before he left Ire land for France. It was in this period of time that he began his collection of short stories The Dubliners. The play depicts a young Joyce and his relationship with his mother and family. The more sensitive side of Joyce is shown as well through his relationship with Nora Barnacle, the actress he fell in love with. "[U]nquestionably a major West Coast theatrical event." Irish-American Press. Book $4.00. Royalty $30 - $20.

***

BROOKLYN ODYSSEY
by Leonard L. Perlmutter
Cast: 3 men and 3 women. Two acts. Comedy. Set: artist's studio.
Jack Hirsh is a New York Jewish artist in his forties. Jack's estranged teenage son, Andy Michaels, has spent his whole life living with his mother, Helen Michaels, in California. Ol' Jack has got the hots for Diana Courtney, his beautiful model in her early twenties. They've just sorta got somethin' going when Andy comes to town. Jack's budding relationship with Diana is complicated by Andy's presence... and particular Andy's having the hots for Diana as well. Diana sorta likes Andy too and that really complicates things. On top of all that, Jack's ex, Helen (y'know Andy's mom?), comes to town as well and it looks as if old flames might be rekindling. Book $4.50. Royalty $30 - $20.

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CHILDLESS COUPLES or YOU BE THE JUDGE
by Leonard L. Perlmutter
Cast: 3 men and 2 women. 2 acts. Drama. Set: living room.
Harry Einhorn is a mild-mannered, middle-aged obstetrician, happily married to Constance and happily having an affair with a Mrs. Jessica Healy. But then, some things happen that don't make Harry quite so happy anymore. First his mistress Jessica informs him that she's pregnant with his child. Then his wife discovers the happy little affair. Then there is Bruce Healy, Jessica's hsuband, who doesn't particularly like the fact that his wife's been screwing around. He's been trying unsuc cessfully to impregnate his wife for some time and when someone else gets her pregnant he doesn't like it one little bit...and he's going to come show Harry just how much he doesn't like it. Book $4.00. Royalty $35 - $25.

***

CHILDREN OF FLESH
by Herschel S. Steinhardt
Cast: 3 men and 2 women. Three acts. Set: exterior.
Tony, a gifted Afro-American tap dancer, moves his wife and teenaged children, into an abandoned shack in a rural deserted area. Tony has refused work lately because it would demean his art. His pragmatic wife, Yolando, insists that his first obligation is to support his children. An old Jew, Aaron, is their only neighbor. Tony discovers Aaron has a wealth of silver in a religious artifact and sees this as possibly his salvation. CHILDREN OF FLESH is a beautiful play written in a Saroyanesque style by a keen observer of human beliefs and life. Also included, "Gates of Heaven," a one act fable on King David's selection of his successor. Book $3.50. Royalty $25 - $20.

***

DANNY, KICK A HOLE IN THE SKY & WHEN IN LOVE WITH A BLIND MAN
by Brian Rickman
"Danny" - Cast: 3 men and 2 women. One act. Set: area staging.
"Danny, Kick A Hole In The Sky" is a painful one act that explores the old dilemma of causality in human fate. Danny has been locked away in an asylum for patricide. His father father raped his girl friend. A doctor probes Danny's feelings and thoughts and a visitor to the asylum offers him love. Is Danny redeemable? In "When In Love With A Blind Man" novelist Roland Burgess is a a blind paraplegic who knows his wife is cheating on him with lovers she brings home. Roland finds a reason to continue living in a young nurse. Book $3.00. Royalty $20 - $15 (both); $15 - 10 (one).

***

DIFFERENT MIRRORS
by Eugene Yanni
Cast: "Notice Me" - 1 man and 1 woman. "Broadway Babies" - 3 men and 3 women. "Orchard Street" - 2 men and 2 women. "Poison Mushrooms" - 3 men and 3 women. Set: "Notice Me" - the office of the American Record Club. "Broadway Babies" - a Greenwich Village apartment. "Or chard Street" - area staging. "Poison Mushrooms" - a Paris funeral parlor. DIFFERENT MIRRORS is a collection of four one-acts united in that they are all old-fashioned love stories. The first, "Notice Me," concerns a idealistic secretary working in the office of an executive of the American Record Company who dreams she was a singer. She spends the day hearing songs of the 1950's in her head and dealing with the passions of her alcoholic boss. In "Broadway Babies" the unstable Deborah has just had someone murdered in her apartment. The third, "Orchard Street", concerns a Jewish family living in New York in the 1930's. Finally, in "Poison Mushrooms" a French woman has just lost her husband and fears he may have been murdered. Book $4.00. Royalty $35 - $25 (all together); $10 - $5 (singly).

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EVERYMAN'S DREAM
by Dick W. Zylstra
Cast: 3 men and 3 women. Two acts. Comedy. Set: Living room.
The subject is charitable scams and the bit of con-man that exists in everyone. Buddy Bright is looking for the ultimate scam that is both legal and lucrative. His best friend, Al Scribner, believes he has found every man's dreama nymphomaniac girlfriend who owns a liquor store. Mike, the building superintendent, runs several lucrative scams on his own. All four characters join in forming a "non-profit" scam devised by Buddy which promises to make them a fortune, yet is legitimate. The finale has the actors passing out flyers for their cause to the audience. Book $4.00. Royalty - $30 - $20.

***

AN EXTRA PLACE FOR DINNER
by Brent Hartinger
Cast: 2 women and 3 men. Two acts. Fantasy. Set: The living room/dining room.
It's Thanksgiving at the Davises but it's not your usual Thanksgiving dinner, because none of the Davises can communicate. Oh, they can all talk; it's just that they have some difficulty talking to each other and only eighteen-year-old Scott sees the predicament the family is in. But this Thanksgiving, an unusual guest arrives for dinner a guest who seems to know more about the Davises than they know about themselves. Jeff, the mysterious guest, makes Scott a bet: that he can make the family communicate Jeff promises to tell Scott the truth about who he is; but if he wins and he can make them talk Jeff makes Scott promise to work to keep them communicating. And here begins one of the most unusual evenings of all time. Book $4.00. Royalty $35 - $25.

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FOR SECOND SPRINGS
by G. A. Cox
"The Scholar's Wife" Cast: 2 men and 1 woman; "Via Humanitas" Cast: 2 men and 3 women; "The Guerdon, or a St. Luke's Summer Recompense" Cast: 2 men and 2 women. Set: area staging. Who ever said theatre cannot be serious and, at the same time, funny? These three plays are modern versions of the medieval interlude given at banquets; together they capture the playfullness of the first spring in English, secular theatre. In form they are highly adaptable to being staged with full or minimal staging. "The Scholar's Wife" presents a young woman, abandoned by a husband more in love with learning, who encounters a handsome, widowed merchant. "Via Humanitas" allows three sisters traveling along a road to take up with two very different companions, a clergyman and a warrior returning from battle. In "The Guerdon, or a St. Luke's Summer Recompense" Lady Katherine and her companion, Marguerite, engage two courtiers in a game of chance to forecast the future. This collection provides a delightfully different alternative to an evening's entertainment. Actors love the freedom of this form which allows each performer to be impish and to clown with abandon. Book $3.00. Royalty $30 - $20. $15 - $10 (a single play).

***

GOING BACK
by Louis Valentine
Cast: 3 men, 3 women, and a boy. Three acts: Drama. Set: a living room.
Most normal parents would not allow their son to get near a pederast. But when he arrives in the form of an old school buddy you haven't seen in decades, and he is a billionaire offering all kinds of goodies, and you only suspect he might be a pervertThis is the basic tension provided in GOING BACK. For Lenny, Ben's wife, there is also the frightening possibility that her husband may have been involved sexually with their distinguished guest when they were students at Princeton. GOING BACK is a play about the seductive power of money and the seductive power of just plain old seduction. Book $5.00. Royalty $30 - $20.

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THE GREAT ADVENTURE
by Harold Lighty
Cast: 4 men and 2 women. Two acts. Comedy. Set: a real estate project. What would you do if you were stranded in the desert? The scene is the Big Deal Real Estate Co . in Devil's Island, Utah, and there is nothing for miles around. The phone doesn't work. There is no more gas. No water. No food. This is Adam Mason's situation as owner of the Big Deal. He has no water, no food, no gas and no working phone. His only hope is a buyer will show up and rescue him. Who shows up is"Eve" who took a wrong turn somewhere. Guess whatshe has no water, food or gas either. Professor Minsky and a cute blond named Jeanne drift in, again with no food, water or gas. What transpires is the whackiest dialogue of people caught in such a predicament. It is almost Noel Coward on the desert. Book $4.00. Royalty $30-$20.

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HIGH TIME
by Alan Rossett
Cast: 3 men and 2 women. Two acts. Set: area staging..
HIGH TIME is a French playwright's comic look at the saga of an American family. The play premiered at the Hampstead Theatre Club, London, and has subsequently been produced at the Australian Theatre, Sydney, the Cour des Miracles, Paris, and had an additional run at the Théâtre La Bruyère. Critical reception around the world has been lavish: From France: "Total TheatreHere is the most irresistibly wild play of the season. This writer keeps his caustic eye open and, above all, his caricatures plausible. There's not a drop of irony without a moment of truthone can hardly describe a show so bursting with exuberancelighting a sparkler of the unexpected on the tip of each laugh." Le Quotidien de Paris. "A little crazy, a little sad, that's sometimes wicked, always funnythat's HIGH TIME. A sly kind of play that takes you by surprise and never lets you goI was charmed by the nonchalance of its insolence and fantasy. And I got the message without having it shoved down my throat. HIGH TIME has something completely original about it, hard to defineand giving it a place of its own outside the rather run of the mill world of the theatre. An unexpected delight." France Soir. "I think one would have to be have to be made of marble not to be entertained by this 'family chronicle'The audience was held breathless by the actorsobviously having the time of their lives while tearing each other apart" L'Economie. From England: "the audience nearly fell off their seats and I feared the man in front of me would die of apoplectic mirth." Mortimer, The Observer. "Colour this cartoon black and funny! Alan Rossett's black comic fantasy is his first play to appear in London. It will not, one trusts, be his last. A grotesque and often wildly funny strip cartoonthe author's ironic wit brings it all into a new and sharp relief. A razor-edged evening" Tinker, Daily Mail. "Alan Rossett's HIGH TIME is an absurdist comedy tinged with surrealism. It is a coy and knowing fantasy with some very good jokesplayed with aplomp." Hobson, Sunday Times. "The American way of self-destruction is ably and amusingly documented in HIGH TIME" Hepple, Where to Go. "Interest From Australia: "HIGH TIME is full of promise and high intensity." The Manly Daily. Book $4.00. Royalty $30 - $20.

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IF I'M DEAD START WITHOUT ME
by Vernon Hinkle
Cast: 4 men and 1 woman. Two acts. Mystery. Set: hunting lodge-type living room.
A doctor, an artist and a novelist return to the lake house they shared ten years ago as college room mates. Two of their number are missing, a ukulele player who drowned in the lake before graduation and a teacher who died recently. A woman who had been the object of a love triangle among them joins them and, fulfilling the teacher's deathbed wish, the foursome conduct a seance to summon the departed roommates to the reunion. In the darkness, the novelist is strangled to death by a ukulele string. Enter the detective-landlord, and a complex plot begins to unravel, with many surprises and nothing turning out to be what it seemed. "Funny, tragic, enlightening and spine tingling. A must see," Darien News. "A gripping tale. An insightful examination of close human relationships...from (which) the show derives its power" Fairfield Citizen-News. Book $4.00. Royalty $35 - $25.

***

THE IMPORTANCE OF BEING MARRIED
by Robert W. Witt
Cast: 4 men and 2 women. Three acts. Comedy. Set: living room.
In THE IMPORTANCE OF BEING EARNEST Gwendolen's mother Lady Bracknell required Jack to acquire suitable parents before she would allow him to marry her daughter. In THE IMPORTANCE OF BEING MARRIAGE Alan's grandmother, Mrs. Edwards, refuses to allow Alan to possess a fortune unless he can produce a wife. Alan shows no inclination to do so; he prefers to remain in blissful poverty with his male roommate. His friends, however, convince Alan to put one over on Granny and have even picked up a girl with a zero I.Q. to play the role of wife. The world has come a long way since THE IMPORTANCE OF BEING EARNEST. Book $4.00. Royalty - $35 - $20.

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IN YOUR FOOTSTEPS
by David H. Lawrence
Cast: 4 men and 2 women. Two acts. Set: area staging.
Tiffany and Alex are a couple living in an over-priced apartment in Queens, New York. Alex, in his late sixties, is an elevator operator during the day and a couch potato in the evenings. His favorite show is "All in the Family." Tiffany is a saleswoman for a wholesaler in the garment industry, and while Alex watches TV, she is out entertaining other men. Of course, Alex and Tiffany want the best for their daughter, Amanda. But Amanda's role model is her mother, and despite Tiffany's objection Amanda goes her mother's route and a little farther. For good or ill, children are offshoots of their parents. IN YOUR FOOTSTEPS is a lesson for parents and children. Book $3.50. Royalty $30 - $20.

***

JAKE
by Michael Corrigan
Cast: 3 men and 2 women. Three acts. Drama. Set: seedy living room. Jake Gilmore is a fifty year old writer and former actor obsessed with his Hollywood past, including friendship with James Dean. Jake is eager to make a comeback as a writer, but his head is full of out-dated and hack ideas. Thus, Jake enlists a fresh young mind to collaborate with him, Marshall Goodman. Marshall is a bright twenty-three old, just out from New York, and eager to make a mark in Hollywood. The only thing that can stop the Jake and Marshall team is Marshall's insistence on making it a good script. Complications arise when Jake's twenty year old mistress Sandra tries to seduce Marshall. Two minor charactersan unscrupulous, affected producer in his mid-twenties and an ageless prosti tuteround out the cast and underscore the Hollywood-is-sleaze theme. Into this pond scum, the ethical Marshall desires to throw his career. JAKE is in the best tradition of THE DISENCHANTED (Schulberg & Breit). Book $3.50. Royalty $30-$20.

***

JANE CLEGG
by St. John Ervine (adapted for the American stage by Herschel S. Steinhardt)
Cast: 3 men and 3 women. Three acts. Drama. Set: living room. First produced at the Gaiety Theatre, Manchester, England, in 1913, JANE CLEGG is the voice of an early century mother who washes, cooks, nurses, mends and teaches her childrenwho gives everything, but whose husband is not faithful. Steinhardt's adaptation keeps the early Century dating but transfers the locale to Northern Michigan. In 1913, JANE CLEGG was a small voice in the wilderness crying for equality of the sexes. Today, the play is a measure of how much attitudes have changed. Book $3.50. Royalty $30-$20.

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"A JEALOUS GOD"
by Herschel L. Steinhardt
Cast: 2 men and 4 women. Two acts. Drama. Set: living room.
"For I thy Lord thy God am a jealous God, visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon the children until the third and fourth generation of them that hate me." So says God in the Bible. Philip is a dissipated philandering alcoholic who has a very deep impression on his daughter Alice. Philip's abuse of Alice and her mother, Evelyn, so scars Alice's psyche that it destroys her own life. Steinhardt chronicles a tragedy that occurs all too frequently. Book $3.50. Royalty $30$20.

***

THE LAST DAMNED WITCH IN SALEM
by Jules Tasca
Cast: Principles: 3 men and 3 women and a variable cast. Two acts. Comedy. Set: suggestive.
Sylvia Honeywell settles with her daughter, Donna, in Salem, Mass., in 1694 with the ostensible intention of opening a tavern. Sylvia's real purpose is to give Donna a chance to know her father Rev. Calvin Cumber. The Rev. Cumber doesn't remember Sylvia, and doesn't realize Donna is his daughter. He has become an outward prig, full of church morality. Secretly, he lusts after the Widow Faith Underhill, who he induces to marry him. But there is a catchFaith will not consummate the marriage, out of respect for her deceased husband. This leaves one very sexually frustrated minister. His real test comes, however, when it is revealed to him who Sylvia and Donna are, just at the point when the town wants to burn Sylvia and Donna as witches. A comedy with a timeless message for the self-righteous of every age. Book $4.50 Royalty - $35 - $25.

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LOOK 'EM STRAIGHT IN TH' EYE, BOY!
by William C. Furby
Cast:4 men and 1 woman. One act. Comedy. Set: bunkhouse.
It is often said that laughter is the best medicine. If so, LOOK 'EM STRAIGHT IN TH' EYE, BOY! will provide an ample dose for some stressed-out psyches in the audience. No somber mes sages trembling with deeper meanings here; just a serving of some good, old-fashion humor from the Americana of the early West. It's guaranteed to get all those frayed nerves back in tune with the funny bone. With a single, minimal set, small cast wearing levis and shirts, boots not required, and technical requirements of zero, this comedy can be produced with the financing from a piggy bank. Book $3.00. Royalty - $15 - $10.

***

MAN-O-WAR
by Louis Phillips
Cast: 4 men and 2 women. Romantic drama. Two acts. Set: area staging.
A love story of a divorced couple. Set in Columbia, Mississippi in 1947. The grip of World War II and its insanity is large on the psyches. A struggle for meaning and dignity.
Book $4.50. Royalty $35-20.

***

MISTRESS OF DESIRE
by Leonard L. Perlmutter
Cast: 2 men and 3 women. Two acts. Comedy. Set: living room.
Sam Redfield is a successful playwright in his early fifties. Sam's son, Victor, hates his father be cause he believes his mother's suicide was brought on by Sam's infidelity. Just when it looks like Sam might be able to patch things up with Victor, Victor discovers his wife, Karin, has had a little late night engagement with Sam. MISTRESS OF DESIRE is an old-fashioned comedy-drama rare in our timeit's about and for civilized people. Book $4.00. Royalty $30 - $20.

***

LE MOULIN
by John David Ballam
Cast: 4 men and 1 woman. One act. One set.
What happens to intellectual people imprisoned by circumstance in a condition of poverty and degradation? How do they cope with their situation? And where will they seek escape? These are the questions. J. D. Ballam has sought to address in his one act tragedy, LE MOULIN. The scene is a small cottage near a village on the coast of Brittany in the early 19th Century. The Father, once an accomplished student at the Sorbonne, has become a drunken bully with a savage temper; the Mother, after twenty years of poverty and suffering, is beginning to lose her mind; Gervais, the older son, is blind and consumptive. And then there is Victor, the younger son, the last hope for the fam ily. And the ghost of the Millowner, who is blamed for the family's poverty. LE MOULIN is a very literate, poetically charged gothic dream. Books $2.50. Royalty - $15 - $10.

***

NOCTURNE MELODY
by Dick W. Zylstra
Cast: 2 men and 3 women. Two acts. Comedy. Set: apartment.
NOCTURNE MELODY is a TOOTSIE in book publishing. A young male writer takes a job at a publisher as a female editor to push his book manuscript. When he gets the job, the fun and prob lems begin. His mother visits, unaware of the charade. His boss, a lesbian, tries to make out with him. His girlfriend suspects he's cheating on her. Book $4.50 Royalty $30 - $20.

***

THE OK WHITEHORNS
by Eloise Rodkey Rees
Cast: 1 man and 5 women. Two acts. Drama. Set: dining room.
Gram is a well-to-do grandmother with a vapid, selfish, self-centered daughter, Vonda, and three equally shallow, grasping, unattractive grandchildren. About the only thing Vonda and her three brats can hold in their heads is their own specific demand from Gram: Vonda wants money for a cruise where she can meet a rich sixth husband. Chris (Christine) begs for finances to help Cherokee Indians. Bernie (Bernice) wants Gram to bankroll a preserve for Texas Horned Toads. Ted lusts after Gram's Ferrari. Gram only has the picture of her dead husband to talk to and try to solve the problem of: What do you do when people only love you for your money. Book: $4.00. Royalty $30-$20.

***

ONE HAND CLAPPING
by John W. Fiero
Cast: 3 men and 3 women (with doubling). Four one acts. Comedy. Sets: area staging.
A quartet of one-act plays for ensemble players held together by a theme: In each play, an irrepress ible or whacky intruder plays laughable havoc with even the best of manmade plans. In "A Fool proof, Legal Whey," an earthy and persistent woman who raises goats invades a judge's chambers after he has had the temerity to rule that she must stop selling unpasteurized milk. Before she is through, the judge is convinced that she is part of a conspiracy to reduce him to idiocy. "Getting Rid of Horace," pits a smug, WASP suburbanite against neighbors he perceives as unwanted and unwel come interlopers. While he spies on their activities and voices his venomous prejudice, his neighbors go expeditiously about their task of building an ark for the impending flood. In "Squatter's Rites," a victim of "smotherly" love refuses to be evicted by his landlady. "Manny's Full Count" is a strange tale of revenge of pigeons! Book $5.00. Royalty - $35 - $25 (all); $15 - $10 (individually).

***

PANDAMONIUM
by Terrance Fox
Cast: 3 men and 2 women. One act. Comedy. Set: the cage at a zoo.
Wham Bam and Kim Kim are two pandas in an American zoo. Wham Bam is a crude, streetwise New York type, while Kim Kim is a snobbish debutante. Wham Bam is constantly coming on to her, which she finds nothing more than disgusting. Throughout the play this scenario continues, with the pandas occasionally being interrupted by such human nuisances as the zoo keeper and the animal inspector. There's also an environmentalist, who parades up and down in front of the cage shouting for the pandas to be freed and sent back to the wild, something they don't particularly want to have happen at all. Book $2.00. Royalty $15 - $10.

***

PASSIONS AND PLANKS
by George Haessler
Cast: 5 men and 1 woman. Two acts. Symposium. Set: bare stage.
A playwright, producer, director, actor, actress, and critic gather to discuss the theatre. All are un named but famous. The playwright is Shakespeare; the actor is Booth; the actress: Sarah Bernhardt. The producer, director and critic are equally as notable for their contributions to theatre. No matter that these geniuses were not contemporaries. PASSIONS AND PLANKS is an imaginary symposium on our favorite topic by a cultivated observer, who has a special gift for evoking an atmosphere in which ideas matter and comments on the nature of, condition of, and contributions to theatre will fly around the audience's heads like firecrackers off a pinwheel. Book $4.00. Royalty $25 - $20.

***

PREFAB
by Richard Hansen
Cast: 3 men and 3 women. One act. Comedy. Set: living room.
Gloria and Ron have just discovered each other. Somewhat blinded by love, they warmly welcome another couple, Hank and Paula bearing champagne, to the scene. Hank and Paula, however, are con artists, and "liberate" Gloria's home of some goods. Gloria's mother, Mrs. Ellery, returns home to discover the "in-house" theft, and a Police Officer arrives. Book $3.00. Royalty $15 - $10.

***

PUPPY LOVE
by Tom Eagan
Cast: 3 men and 2 women. Two acts. Comedy/whodunit. Set: living room.
"Not even my mother when I was bornwas as happy to see me as Dorie!" bawls Boris Domino recalling his dead dog. "Fang and I would sit for hours in silence, and more was said in that silence than a life-time of b.s. with people!" blubbers Paul Bisquick in response. Paul's dog Fang has just died, so thirty-five year old Paul is moving out of town; he can't stand being in a place where, "Every tree, every fire hy drant, every lampost" reminds him of Fang. While he is packing up to leave, however, both his teenage girl friend and his married girl friend show up. Also, an Inspector arrives to investigate the murder of a member of the "doggie club." Paul is under suspicion. Soon everyone is under suspicion. Would someone kill for the love of a dog?! A whodunit spoof dedicated to all dog lovers. Book $4.00. Royalty $30-$20.

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REMEMBER YOUR MARRIAGE VOWS, MOTHER!
or PATIENCE PAYS BIG DIVIDENDS
by Francis Hoffmann
Cast: 4 men and 2 women. Old-fashioned, boo-and-hiss melodrama in one act. Set: a cold and shabby room expressive of extreme poverty. 1944. World War II is raging. Hard times for Marjorie Fairbrow Pitkin, whose soldier-husband is overseas and three years missing. Impoverished, Marjorie takes in washing to support herself and her young son, Little Elfie. Marjorie's woe's are almost too much to bear, intensified by Gideon Fairbrow, her drunken father, by Mrs. Slovenleigh, her greedy landlady, and by Paul Pewtridd, her mailman, who is both larcenous and eager to share her bed. Unbeknownst to her, Marjorie is the addresse for a registered letter from Bumble, Fumble & Stumble, a law firm, advising her that she is heir to a cool million dollars a letter as yet undeliv ered by Pewtridd. While Marjorie is absent for business reasons, Pewtridd and Mrs. Slovenleigh steam open aforementioned letter and immediately plot to get their hot little hands on subject cool million. Later, with her spirits at their lowest ebb, Marjorie breaks down and consents to marry the dastardly Pewtridd. He is about to claim her hand (and body and fortune), when, lo and behold, in races the long-missing Marlborough! Book $3.00. Royalty $15 - $10.

***

THE SCOTIAN WOMEN
by Lee Pennington
Cast: 1 man, 5 women, and a chorus of 5 women. Poetic drama. Two acts. Setting: area staging. In 1976 the nation's attention was riveted for a time on a mining disaster in Scotia, Kentucky, and the rescue effort to free the trapped miners. The disaster ended; the nation's attention passed on; the event became history. In the best tradition of Maxwell Anderson, poet/playwright Lee Pennington has taken the raw material of an event and sought not to record it, but to understand it, to give it meaning and to memorialize it in art form. His structural model is Sophocles' THE TROJAN WOMEN. In THE SCOTIAN WOMEN five women await the outcome of the rescue mission: a pregnant wife; an old widow, who has lost four sons to the mines; the wife of a Black miner; a sister of one of the trapped miners; and the wife of an adulterous miner. THE SCOTIAN WOMEN premiered at the University of Kentucky. "The poetry in Lee Pennington's latest play, THE SCOTIAN WOMEN, is complex, haunting, evocativeAnd the situations that Pennington devel ops with his characters ring true." The Lexington Leader. Book $4.00. Royalty - $30 - $20.

***

THE SECRET OF HONEYMOON ISLAND
by Murray Spitzer
Cast: 2 men and 4 women. Three acts. Fantasy. Setting: living room of a luxury suite.
Mike Brooks and Steve Allison, young partners in a very successful Nevada mining venture, cel ebrate their good fortune by a two-week vacation at a fabulous South Pacific Island resort for the very wealthy. Objective: girls! Steve is very serious about finding someone to marry, but Mike is in no hurry to settle down as long as there are tigers out there to tame. They are astonished to learn that they have come to a family resort, and the girls they seek aren't there. Or are they? Suddenly, four very attractive, provocative, highly desirable young women introduce themselves. They are resort employeesa golf pro, a tennis pro, a doctor, and a psychologist. The coincidence all seems to be too easyand it is. Mike and Steve begin to realize that there will be a price to pay, a strange, unknown price, and it may be far too high. Book $4.50. Royalty - $35 - $20.

***

SHRINK!
by Bill Wine
Cast: 2 men and 4 women. One act. Comedy. Set: office.
Not too many psychiatrists have show business parents who make their points with vaudeville routines. Even fewer psychiatrists have parents who are so interested in seeing how their son con ducts his sessions with patients that they will hide in his office closet to overhear what goes on. David Berman is a psychiatrist blessed with such parents. He is also blessed with a series of women patients who fall in love with him and and an overly devoted receptionist who breaks into tears at the slightest provocation. In short, David Berman is surrounded by people who love him enough to drive him crazy. This easy to produce comedy by award-winning playwright Bill Wine was pre miered by the Greenbelt Players, Maryland. Book $2.50. Royalty - $15-$10.

***

THE SOCIAL SECURITY SCAM
by Dick W. Zylstra
Cast: 3 women and 2 men. Two acts. Comedy.Set: a rural home.
Cornelius Cobb is a teenager who lives with his sister Wendy, his Grandma and his widowed mother. His Grandpa died a while back, but the government doesn't seem to know that because they keep continuing to send him his social security checks. Cornelius and Wendy don't mind this a bit be cause they can cash the checks and use the money to pay for all sorts of goodies like a phone, a TV, and new drapes. It'll all work out fine, if they can just keep the truth about where their money's coming from concealed from their mother...and the government. This last part proves a little hard to do when Vance Clayborn, a government man, starts coming around asking to speak to their deceased Grandpa. And when Vance Clayborn takes a romantic interest in their mother it becomes especially hard and the fun really starts. Book $4.00. Royalty $30 - $20.

***

THE SPIRIT OF POOR FORK and THE PORCH
by Lee Pennington
Cast: "Poor Fork" - 4 men and 2 women. "The Porch" - 2 men and 2 women. Setting: "Poor Fork" - outside a deserted mountain cabin. "The Porch" - a front porch of a mountain cabin. If Robert Frost and Anton Chekhov had lived in Kentucky and collaborated on plays, the results would be what Lee Pennington does. Both of these easy to produce short one acts give us slices of life in Kentucky mountain country. In "The Spirit of Poor Fork" a young couple meet at a deserted cabin planning on running away. They discover their fathers about to kill each other. In "The Porch" a family waits for the return of their hired man. The son sings a sad love ballad about his fiance who has just died, while his sister pines, "Ma, I ain't never been so lonely in my life. Ever' year gets worse." Not much happens, but the poetry and characters are there as they seldom are in plays with twice as much action. Book $2.00. Royalty - $15 - $10 (together); $10 - $5 (individually).

***

TABLE FOR THREE
by Brent Hartinger
Cast: 3 men and 2 women. One act. Fantasy. Set: Family/dining room.
Twenty-three year old Rich Stagnam knows well enough what it's like to not conform to a parent's expectations; in fact, his mother has wished so hard for a better son that she's even conjured up "Richard," a perfect but fictional replacement. Until, that is, one night when Judith the insurance salesperson appears, and Rich decides to fight for his identity. Book $2.50. Royalty $15 - $10.

***

THE TOPPER
by Leonard L. Perlmutter
Cast: 2 men and 3 women. Two acts. Comedy/drama. Set: Office.
Dr. Jason Clifford is a practicing physician, an internist, who has started a research project to find a cure for a deadly new disease, New Plague. To take his nurse/girl friend Marcia along with him into the research project, he pays to have her go off to get a degree that will qualify her as a lab assistant. Meanwhile, to keep things humming in his new lab, Jason hires Donna to fill in as a lab assistant till Marcia can come on line. Donna also manages to fill in as surrogate lover with always out-of-line Jason, and Donna is a little more forceful than Marcia in pressing Jason to divorce his wife, Eileen. How does Eileen handle all this and manage to win her husband back? Well, that's the topper, that has to be seen to believed. Book $4.00. Royalty $35-$20.

***

TRAIN TO BENGALI
by Alexander Panas
Cast: 5 men and 1 woman. Three acts. Mystery. Set: area staging.
Inspector Vasili is back! yes, the famed Antonios Vasili of THE BIRD OF PARADISE CAPER. Having retired from the NYPD, and on his way to New Orleans to get married, Vasili is forced to investigate the case of the disappearing parents of Michelle LeRue. Is the young and tempting Michelle LaRue, herself, responsible for their disappearance? Or might it be her AC/DC boyfriend, Fritz? What could be the motive? Have the parents been kidnapped by Nazis?! In New York? Vasili is up against his most baffling case, and even worse, the enigmatic and sensual Michelle sucks him into her web. And what does Bengali have to do with it? Intrigue, romance and fireworks, as Vasili moves relentlessly into the unknown. The sweet aroma of motion pictures like The Maltese Falcon and Casablanca invade the script, along with Mr. Panas' own sense of ironic humor. A gripping melodrama with comic innuendo. Inspector Vasili is one of the most fascinating detectives of the modern stage: a combination of Sherlock Holmes, Sam Spade and Philip Marlowe, with a dash of the ancient and the occult. Book $5.00. Royalty - $35 - $25.

***

TWO IN THE BUSH
by John W. Fiero
Cast: 3 men and 2 women (with doubling). Two one-act. Comedy.Sets: two, minimal.
TWO IN THE BUSH includes "Dear Ms. Mandy" and "Hell Is A Thirty-Second Spot." Although the pieces are unrelated, they can be performed by an ensemble group on the same evening. "Dear Ms. Mandy" spoofs the facile advice given by syndicated columnists to those seeking help with personal problems. Ms. Mandy, totally unaware of the impact of her counsel, offers remedies to a variety of troubled souls, all with disastrous but comic results. Meanwhile, Ms. Mandy is having problems of her own with a two-legged, live-in pet named Moose. "Hell Is A Thirty-Second Spot" strands three good old boys and one good old girl in a perpetual summer day in nowhere, Texas, where they seem bound to an eternity of doing commercials for beer they are not allowed to drink. Book $3.50. Royalty $25 - $10 (together) $15 - $10 (separate).

***

THE VICTROLA
by Louis Valentine
Cast: 5 men. One act. Drama. Set: Pro shop of a tennis club.
"This is the melody, Jerry," Dalton tells the bewildered young college student, "the stuff memories are made ofthe melody Big Red's power ethic and pneumatic drills and bulldozers, and the punk -rock music they gave you, have drowned out to numb your consciences and kill your soulsbecause they are afraid of your souls, Jerry. This is the melody that will return to save this country. Follow that music, Jerry, and perhaps your generation can be saved" THE VICTROLA pits the charm of the Big-band era against the punk-rock noise of today. The hero is a sixty-seven year old who travels around in a Pierce Arrow, carries a beat-up victrola as his "salvation kit," and is one helluva tennis player. THE VICTROLA has an interesting thesis: Power, like punk-rock music, can't stand up to finesse and melody. When a country relies on power and loses its melody, it is doomed. Book $3.00. Royalty $20 - $15.

***

VOYAGE OF DISCOVERY
by Leonard L. Perlmutter
Cast: 4 men and 2 women. Two acts. Comedy. Set: living room.
Philip Austen, is a successful novelist whose wife, Abby, a top-flight actress, has left him for a handsome young actor, Josh Lee. Philip writes a play about his problem and tries to get Abby to play her part in it. Philip is trying to get his wife back, and is blinded to the adoration and love of his vivacious secretary, Lynn. Perlmutter specializes in comedy of manners, love problems of the only aristocracy America hasthe well-to-do and famous. Reminiscent of the plays of S. N. Berhman. Book $3.00. Royalty $30 - $20.

***

THE WAITING
by Roger Myers
Cast: 3 men and 3 women. Two acts. Comedy. Set: A parlor.
Widowed Homer Bramm, in his 70's, and his spinster sister, Azenith, in her 60's, live in Victorian quiet and orderliness. They do not have or want a radio or TV, or even a phone. They never go anywhere, and aside from keeping the house up, their principle occupation is recalling the past. Azenith regrets most that she never married. Homer seems to regret little though he can be brought to tears over the fact that his late wife made him agree to a marriage without sex after she conceived their son, Richard. Richard, a widower himself now in his 40's, and his daughter, Nina, in her 20's, come to ask Homer's blessing on their impending marriages. Book $4.50. Royalty - $35 - $25.

***

THE WATCHERS
by Wells McConnell
Cast: 2 women, 4 men and one young girl. One act. Comedy. Set: front room.
LeRoy, a dog catcher hair stylist, is fussing with his Aunt Bertha's hair early one morning when their friends, Cora and Mortimer drops by. As is their habit, they exchange bits of gossip about the neigh borhood, and while watching out the window, nothing escapes their scrutiny. When joined by Sam, the mailman, the friends decides to play their favorite game: Radio detectives of the 1940's. Leaving one person on watch at the window, the others try to baffle each other with murder mysteries. Upon hearing a car door slam, all of them rush to the window and soon became caught up in what seems to be a real murder right across the street. Book $3.00. Royalty $20 - $10.

***

WISH IN ONE HAND
by Donna Roberts
Cast: 3 men and 3 women. One act. Fantasy. Set: a living room.
Joe Shelton is a compulsive gambler who does nothing but spend all his time betting on one thing or anotheralways waiting for that big jackpot that will put him and his family on Easy Street. Mean while, his wife, Paula, works, his live-in mother-in-law, Agnes makes fun of him, and his daughter, Diane, is resigned to their poverty. Then one day, Joe gets a magic wishing well in the mail (minia ture version), which assures him ten wishes for ten bucks. Gullible Joe appropriates ten from Paula's checkbook. This looks like about the stupidest and lowest thing Joe has ever wasted Paula's money ontill the wishes start coming true! The money is rolling in; everything is going too welleven his mother-in-law likes him. Then Mr. D.W. shows up at the door to claim Joe's soul, and WISH IN ONE HAND turns into a modernized "The Devil and Daniel Webster." Book $3.00. Royalty $15 - $10.

***

WOEMAN
by Paul Stephen Lim
Cast: 1 man and 5 women. Two acts. Drama. Set: a studio apartment.
WOEMAN is the tragic story of Charley Womack. He was raised by his mother, entered into a marriage with a woman who pitied more than loved him. Since his divorce, he has had a passing affair, presently, he is in love with a German lady, who he discovers doesn't fully return his affec tion. Everything blows up for him and he winds up in a hospital mental ward. The women in his life meet to pick over the pieces. WOEMAN was first produced at the University of Kansas in 1978 and subsequently off-Bway by the Shelter West Co. in '81. "Lim's play is rich in resonances, allusions and symbols. His sensitivity and imagination show a literary intelligence," Glenn Loney, After Dark. "A psychological whodunit...The playwright cleverly and successfully weaves the informative flashbacks...in to the present," Joanne Pottlitzer, Other Stages. "Lim has written characters of substance, depth and complexity...An emotionally exhausting study of the impact of divorce and the inevitable failure of human relationships...Riveting...A human drama that aims for the gut," John Bush Jones, The Kansas City Star. "...leaves the audience gasping," Lawrence Journal World. Book $5.00. Royalty $35- $20.

***

THE WORLD'S SECOND GREATEST LOVER & SINGAPORE SLING
by Alexander Panas
Cast: "Lover" 4 men and 2 women; "Sling" 1 man and 1 woman Sets: "Lover" area staging; "Sling" an airport. In THE WORLD'S SECOND GREATEST LOVER the silver screen's greatest lover collapses, and tells the film industry, "Get my brother Guiseppe to replace me, the world's second greatest lover." Immediately the Hollywood bunch is on its way to Sicily for Tortoni's brother Guiseppe. But what a shock when they find him! He is a hideous hunchback studying for the priesthood! But the celluloid boys are all magic, and finally...finally...! The play is based loosely on a true story. In SINGAPORE SLING a flight destined for L.A. is hijacked to Singapore on Christmas Eve, and the stage is set for romance. All the passengers are getting plugged at the local bar, and the only two people at the terminal are Gerald and Suzie. The story of two budding neurotics who attempt to solve their problems in each other's arms. Book $3.00. Roy alty $25 - $15 (together); $15 - $10 (single).

***

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